“I can shake off everything as I write;
my sorrows disappear,
my courage is reborn.”
– Anne Frank
A Life Remembered
Well, we did it. We made it through September. I won’t say it was perfect, or pretty, or somehow magically made our grief less intense or desperate to be on the other side. But we did feel held, loved, and as though we were able to honor Deacon’s 8th birthday and his first heavenly anniversary.…
Share The Love
September brings both Deacon’s birthday, and the anniversary of his passing. It would be very simple to just focus on our sadness. I could attempt to explain the level of desperation and panic that wells up in my heart when I allow myself to just WANT HIM. More than our sadness though, Derek and I…
September
It’s September. I wouldn’t need to look at a calendar to know that. I can feel it ache in my bones. A buzzing in my nerves and a thudding in my brain. September has haunted the last couple months. September carries the weight of the year. All the lasts were in September. The last full…
Weston Deacon
I’m an aunt again!! Weston Deacon Thuss joined the world on Monday and we’re all so very much in love. Kelsey and Dan are adventurers at their core and I’m so excited for them to start this life-changing one. If we’ve talked at all, you know that bragging about my sister Kelsey is one of…
A Grand Adventure
3 years ago, we started thinking about our family, our home, and what we wanted in the years ahead for our growing kids. We’d always had a dream to spread out on some land, so we started actively pursuing plots of land when they came up around us. Turns out it’s rare, and a bit…
Father’s Day
His answer is always “yes” when it comes to loving on our kids. He picks us up off the ground. He’s fearless (which is where Deacon learned it from). He loves babies whether they came from me or from the car seat of a case worker. He shows fatherly love to those who wouldn’t have…
9 Months
9 months and 14 days ago I sat on this dock and watched Deacon open his 7 year old birthday presents. 14 days later he was gone. This morning, I watched my girls giggle and chase bubbles in the spot he’d exclaimed over his new skateboard. It feels like yesterday. It feels like 100 years…
8 Months
I still don’t understand it. I would have plotted a different way. Yet, without logic or reason, I still feel God’s goodness. For the gift of Deacon when God didn’t have to give him to us in the first place. For the gratitude that bubbles up in me every time I think of how I…
Mother’s Day
Last year, Deacon was discharged from the hospital on Mother’s Day. Because of Covid, I had stayed the entire time with him instead of taking turns with Derek. I was so thankful to be back with all my kids (and my shower and bed), but also so weary and frustrated with another hospital stay. The…
A New Park
At the beginning of the month our family was honored to be included in a special event at the Wichita Children’s Home. A years-long project, put together by bunches of selfless and tireless individuals who are passionate about foster youth, was recently completed! A beautiful new park on the WCH campus. A safe place for…
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